AND THEN YOU WERE GONE

ARRAYAH LLOYND

// Arrayah is a lens based conceptual artist based in Naarm (Melbourne) Australia. Her work explores themes of memory, trauma, neurodivergence, the female experience and otherness. She works with altered/expanded photography, archival imagery and mixed media. For International Women´s Day 2024, which has as its theme “inspire inclusion” we are very proud to share Arrayah´s conceptual art series about face blindness.

Born in the UK and raised in Australia, Arrayah works as a freelance artist and has taught photography at various educational institutions within Australia, specialising in concept development and fine art printing.

“Creating art is a way for me to access and process what is happening for me internally. I draw from my own life experiences and so it is always personal. It is manic, fluid, emotional, experimental, and non-linear in its manifestation. It helps me to make sense of a world that I struggle to be in. We often think we are so alone in our experiences but being able to see ourselves reflected in the work of others can be powerfully healing. it makes us feel less alone and I hope in sharing my work that I am able to give that comfort and solace to others that struggle too.”

Arrayah´s work has been featured in various Australian and International publications, art prizes and awards including Lensculture, Head On Photo Awards, PhotoLucida Critical Mass, and Australian Photography Awards.

Her favourite quote:

“Good luck and don’t f*** it up!”

Ru Paul

What draws you to the arts?

I have processing/sensory issues and art has been a gateway for me in many ways. I am a very visual person, it is my first language of choice. I find it easier to communicate through art than any other means and I love that it can transcend all barriers. It’s just you and this feeling. It doesn’t need words, it doesn’t even need to be beautiful… it just needs to make me feel… something, anything. I want a visceral response when I engage with it even if it that feeling is uncomfortable.

What do you like best about this project?

I love how quickly this body of work was brought to life. I created it in a week. I know when I work this fast that it is important for me and is coming from a place of truth and authenticity. I don’t need to think, I am just in the moment and living it. Once I create a series I then very quickly move on and can’t look at it again for a long time. I don’t feel like that with this work, which is nice. Lets hope that feeling lasts!

8 March is International Women´s Day – IWD. On this day, many organizations and artists try to draw attention to the continuing need to stand up for women´s and girls´ rights, i.e. the rights of half of the world´s population. This year´s IWD motto is #InspireInclusion.

To celebrate International Women’s Day, this year we asked Arrayah Lloynd to share some of her conceptual art. She told us why she created this series:

I have never been able to remember faces. I get people mixed up all the time and often walk right past people I know. When I encounter someone that obviously knows me, I switch into panic mode and stall for time as I desperately try to pick up clues from conversations, visual cues, and vocal mannerisms. The more I see a face the greater the chance it has of imprinting onto my mind, but only when I see you in front of me and in the right context. I also forget people exist if I can’t see them, even people that I am close to and love dearly.

I upset people when I don’t call or see them for long stretches of time, but how do I remember you if you have literally ceased to exist in my mind? I didn’t know it had a name. I didn’t know that it was a genuine neurological condition, likely related to my neurodivergence and not, as I always imagined, some personal defect that I could overcome (if only I would apply myself more). A life spent with so much shame and embarrassment for something that was beyond my control. I am honest with people now, letting go of the need to hide, and replacing it with truth and understanding. It is called prosopagnosia, face blindness or facial agnosia. Also object impermanence: an inability to understand that objects (and people) exist when they are out of sight.

This body of work began with finding some old film negatives long forgotten about. I had been thinking about my facial blindness for some time (a fairly recent realisation about myself) and how much it impacts my life. Using those original negatives was a play on photographic memories and the ability of to remember… or not. The negatives were all abstract and blurred, a bit like my mind, and I thought this was a really great opportunity to explore and understand this aspect about myself. I photographed them whilst holding them up against various backgrounds and then trawled through my archive to find a select few images to add layers to the narrative I was exploring.

I always use saturated colours with my work. I find it soothing despite the fact that it is often at odds with the subject matter I am working with. I suppose it is my own unique visual language that can’t be separated from the work I create. I work on all the images collectively, processing and gradually building each image up – like a jigsaw puzzle that all needs to fit together in the right way. It is important that I am focused on creating a series of strong images that is able to express what I am thinking and feeling.

Knowing how to sequence and cull images for a series is very important and enables you to focus in on the narrative. As hard as it can be, you sometimes need to remove strong images that you love as they are not sitting comfortably within the whole. My processing is all experimental and in the moment. I break all the rules and go down many rabbit holes to find new ways of expressing myself. It is my favourite part of creating and I can get lost in there for hours.

Click on the photos to see the original larger version.